Hot Mess.

I am a hot mess.
Actually, I'm cold.
Because Michigan is bipolar in the weather department.
But seriously, hot mess equals this girl.

I've been home from spring break for 9 days now ... and I miss Rotterdam more than anyone could have ever told me I would. I fell in love with the city, with the people I met there. Being there, being so far out of my comfort zone, I was forced to truly rely on God, and was met head on with the fact that this world is in desperate need of relationship with the Creator. For more on my experience in the Netherlands, feel free to check out our team blog - http://www.nl2011.blogspot.com. I long to be back in Holland... but clearly that isn't an option right now. I have the final 5 weeks of the semester ahead of me, and then a full summer of work, volunteering and taking classes. Summer? Hah. So much for that. I do however look forward to what my future may hold as far as the Netherlands is concerned ... spring break next year? A potentially new summer project in 2012? Who knows. I'm keeping my options open and letting God lead the way.

Why else am I a hot mess? I've been sick since returning home last week - my body hates me. Also, I'm scheduling my last year of undergrad classes at 7am tomorrow. I'm not old enough to be doing this. It seriously freaks me out. Yet another reason? I miss my best friend. She's been in Spain for almost 2 months now. And we've got a little under 2 months to go. Yikes. I don't know. My brain is always going a million miles a minute these days.

The part of me that isn't a hot mess is consistently reminding the rest of me that God is in control, that He won't give me anything I can't handle and that I am a part of an absolutely amazing community, full of people who love me - even if they are spread across 3 continents.

I could ramble on forever, but I need to go to bed and try to kick this sickness.
Goodnight, world.

Leaving on a Jet Plane

Holy smokes.
Spring Break 2011 is here!
The past two weeks of school have been absolute insanity, so the fact that I'm going to the Netherlands ... six time zones away ... across the ocean ... didn't sink in until last night.

Holy freakin' cow.

I'm beyond excited. A little nervous. And I absolutely cannot wait to see what God will do in myself, my team and in the lives of the Dutch students we come into contact with this week.

But, I need to finish up packing because we have to be on the road to the airport in T-minus 20 minutes! Ahhhhhhh!

Lord, Thank you so much for this opportunity. Help us to be a light for you this week. Calm our nerves, let our excitement grow, and keep us focused on the purpose of this trip. Please allow for smooth travels, on-time and safe flights, and a whole lot of fun to be had! Amen.

Excitement.

It's been a long time... this semester is kicking my butt - hard. Five weeks are done, and the time has flown by. There has been very little downtime, crazy 15 (or 19) hour days, a lot of homework, a lot of stress, and little sleep. By little sleep, I mean that my body no longer functions well on less than 8 hours ... getting 6 hours of sleep is unacceptable. My body made that fact perfectly clear when I slept through class last week. Oops.

So... What has happened in the past month of my life? School. Work. Babysitting. Dinners with friends. Heart-to-hearts. Goodbyes. (I've grown to hate them after saying goodbye to my best friend and another awesome friend). A crazy sleepover and photoshoot. A blizzard and my first official college snow day. Life has been full and busy to say the least.

Now, the title "Excitement." ... tonight I met with my spring break team - in 20 days we will be flying to The Netherlands (through Campus Crusade) to partner with Dutch staff and students to reach people for Christ. After our meeting tonight, I am so freakin' excited. Am I nervous? Of course. I'll be traveling to a foreign country - flying over the ocean - talking to people with extremely different backgrounds than I'm used to - experiencing jet lag - etc etc etc. But all of these things that scare me give me so much room to step back and trust God. I'm pumped for that aspect of the trip. My little Christian bubble of West Michigan is going to pop, and it's going to freak me out, but it's going to be so amazing, and I'm pumped for God to do some amazing things! Another thing I'm pumped for? Pictures. I'm so so so excited to take pictures of beautiful old buildings and canals in Amsterdam and to capture memories of what is sure to be an absolutely mind-blowing trip. Ahhh! Excitement. It may be an understatement.

God, help me to draw near to You in the next three weeks. Replace my nervousness with even more excitement. Remind me that this trip is one hundred percent for your glory. Draw our team closer to one another as we draw closer to You. Help us to make an impact for Your kingdom. Amen.

Get Dunked.

Winter Semester 2011 is officially in full swing. The first week of classes is over, items on my to-do list like "Breakfast at Marie Catrib's" have been replaced with "Read Chapters 1 & 2", and I'm back in the habit of hitting my snooze button a few too many times every morning. Oh, the life of a college student.

This semester is going to be a good one, though. Lots of reading. Lots of studying. Lots of writing. Lots of working (well, to me, anyways). And on top of school, I need to find time to study and take the GRE so that I can apply for grad school at the end of the summer. Wow-za. I'm excited for it all. My professors all seem nice. The classes are somewhat interesting (well, physics isn't... but I'm determined to have a good attitude this semester :)).

Still ahead? Two more friends leaving the country (aka lots of Skype dates). Working my butt off to get good grades. Going to The Netherlands on Spring Break. Pouring into the life of an amazing freshman girl.

And happening in T-Minus ~10 hours? I'm gettin' dunked. And by dunked, I mean, baptized. I've been putting it off for years, but it's time to tell the world that I love Jesus, and I want to live a life in pursuit of him. And that, that my friends is why I am getting baptized in the morning.

Now, let's just hope I don't get water up my nose...

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes.

It is 2011.
When did that happen?
Yes, I know January 1 at 12:00am.
But where did the month of December go?

December was a whirlwind. Wrapping up the semester. Finals. Packing up 1/2 my life to move home for 3 weeks. Working at the library. Working at Target for a little holiday help. Christmas. IndyCC. Some of those things sucked, some of them just needed to happen, and some were absolutely, without a doubt, amazing.

Finals went well. I finished strong and am glad Fall Semester 2010 is OVER. Being at home has been wonderful. I have some of the world's greatest roomies at school, but there is just something great about being at home! The week leading up to Christmas I worked my life away. It made the first week of break FLY by, but it was good. Christmas was great - spending time with family and taking the time to remember that without Jesus I would be nothing. IndyCC, well, that deserves it's own paragraph...

Indy was incredible. The theme of the "week" was Unm!stakable. The idea behind it is to live a life that is absolutely unmistakably in pursuit of Jesus. For me, after a crazy month and a half where I pushed my relationship with God to the back burner, my week was spent focusing on God and what it looks like to consistently put Him first in my life. Being in a community of 2000+ college students that were doing the same thing was amazing. Within that, getting close and going deep with some people from GV was awesome, too. Indy made me question why I do things the way I do. Why do I stress so much about school? Why do I worry so much about what other people think? Why am I not giving God my all? What am I passionate about? There is a lot that I am still processing, but these are good things to process. And aside from all of the serious things, I have never laughed so much in my entire life.

Now, since it is 2011, I of course have to recap 2010...
+ Shared my faith on the beaches of Panama City
+ Completed what I thought would be the hardest semester of my life
+ Begin babysitting for an amazing family - the 3 kids have become a huge part of my life
+ Watched my brother and several friends graduate from college
+ Stood up in my brother's wedding and welcomed a sister to the family
+Worked my second summer at Target - and loved yet hated it the whole time
+ Got a job at the library on campus
+ Moved in with 4 amazing girls
+ Became friends with some amazing new people
+ Went back to Ada Bible Church
+ Signed up to go to The Netherlands on spring break
+ Went to IndyCC and decided to make some ch-ch-ch-changes in my life

In 2011, with God's help, I will...
+ Say goodbye to 3 of my best friends as they study abroad for the semester
+ Continuously strive to know God more
+ Stress less
+ Step out of my comfort zone more often
+ Serve others and not focus on myself so much
+ Pour into the lives of others
+ Have fun and enjoy the end of my junior year of college
+ Apply and interview for physical therapy school

Here goes nothing. 2011, welcome. Let's make you a great year.

Countdown Central

T-Minus ~23.5 hours until December.
T-Minus 16 days until this semester is over.
T-Minus 26 days until Christmas.
T-Minus 29 days until IndyCC.
T-Minus 32 days until 2011.
T-Minus 62 days until my best friend leaves for 3.5 months.
T-Minus 95 days until I leave the US for the first time.
T-Minus 96 days until I am in the Netherlands.

November is over. Again, where has the time gone?! Thanksgiving has come and gone, and there are only 16 days left of Fall Semester 2010. A group project and 4 finals are all that stand between me and the sweet freedom of Christmas break. Get pumped.

Christmas break is going to be epic this year. Time with family and friends to relax and not worry about school. Time to hunt for volunteer opportunities and jobs in the health care field. Time to sleep sleep sleep. Time to grow in faith and community at Indy CC. Time to ring in a new year. Time to recoup before next semester starts.

What else is on my countdowns list? My best friend leaving for 3.5 months. Yeah, that is going to suck. I'm pretending it isn't happening. I'm determined to go on with this idea until I absolutely have to say goodbye. Boo.

The most exciting thing on my countdown? I'm going to The Netherlands for Spring Break 2011. I'm terrified. I'm excited. I absolutely cannot wait to see what God is going to do through Agape in Rotterdam. 96 days. 3 months. So far away... but that time is going to FLY.

Father God, Thank you for things that have happened and things to look forward to. Help me to soak in every moment of the next 3 months. Help me to fully trust in you as preparations are made for the trip to Rotterdam. Bring exactly the team together that you want to participate in this trip, Lord. Allow support to be raised both financially and in prayer for our team, and help us to give you all the glory through the support raising process. Amen.

Blink.

It's been over a month.
I swear I barely blinked...
But it's almost Thanksgiving!
This semester has FLOWN by.
Wasn't it just 70 degrees and the beginning of October?
When did this whole 45 degree, windy, dark by 6pm thing happen?

I don't know.

Life has been crazy in the last month... but let's be honest... that's normal. From August thru December and January thru April, I don't know what calm even means. This semester's craziness has been the worst I've ever had... but thankfully, I have some really amazing friends and even better roommates to help me get by. We keep each other sane and laugh at the little things. We stay up until 1 am talking about life instead of doing our homework... which sometimes, is exactly what you need to do.

The sucky part? 3 of those awesome friends are leaving me in a little over 2 months to go to 3 different foreign countries. Prepare yourself, world. Chances are, I'm going to be a hot mess without them next semester.

Well, there isn't really a point to this post other than to say I'm thankful for my roomies and friends... and I'm thankful that four weeks from this moment, I will be 100% done with this semester and on Christmas break.

Can I just blink and have those 4 weeks be done?